...is what I lack extremely.
Today was the start of my Nihongo tutorial sessions with a volunteer from Mishop. Sure, I'm taking Nihongo classes at school, but I feel they're not enough to really improve my Japanese. I kind of feel sympathy for students of Gaba, since in a class of three (or in my case, ten) you really don't get a lot of chance to speak up. Hence, I signed up for the Nihongo private lessons.
We just talked for one hour and a half, and what my tutor said to me was I should be have more confidence in myself, and I shouldn't be too afraid of making mistakes, because if I always let myself be impeded by such things, I won't be able to communicate.
I remember myself saying the exact same words to my Algerian student, who always thinks that his English is not good, and that he can only talk in English to Japanese people. He thinks that he cannot strike a conversation with native speakers because his English is still elementary.
Self-confidence is something that I've always lacked, in whatever I do. People say I give myself too little credit. As for me, I don't want to be confident because I'm afraid of failure. Failure had, has and will always have a big impact on me. I always give my best in everything I do, but I can't say I am confident of the results. For me, if I don't carry too much confidence, then if I fail, I won't be too disappointed. I hate expecting, because if I expect too much, and things do not go as I please, then there's disappointment, which is an understatement, really. It's more of like, depression.
Why don't I just go out with Japanese friends, you ask? Why go all the trouble of signing up for private lessons when you can have "lessons" when you're out talking with friends? That just means you don't know me very well. Going out is not my thing. Sure, I go out sometimes, but that is to take a breather. I don't want to pressure myself thinking about school and serious stuff when I'm with them. Second, they're all busy. They may look oshare and everything, but they are still students of the Tokyo University. They take their studies seriously, and would spend hours in the library studying. They would even sacrifice days that would've been ideal for going out somewhere, just to study. Lastly, students who are always going out are those who love drinking. And most of you know that I DON'T DRINK. So there.
Okay, that would be enough rambling. Right now, all I want to do in my remaining months here in Japan is to improve my conversation skills, and I will just do my best to do just that, without expecting anything. My friends said that I have improved during the past few months, but I don't think it's enough. I have a goal I badly want to reach, and I must do everything I can just to be suitable for that kind of job. Oooh~ Pressure.XD
Today was the start of my Nihongo tutorial sessions with a volunteer from Mishop. Sure, I'm taking Nihongo classes at school, but I feel they're not enough to really improve my Japanese. I kind of feel sympathy for students of Gaba, since in a class of three (or in my case, ten) you really don't get a lot of chance to speak up. Hence, I signed up for the Nihongo private lessons.
We just talked for one hour and a half, and what my tutor said to me was I should be have more confidence in myself, and I shouldn't be too afraid of making mistakes, because if I always let myself be impeded by such things, I won't be able to communicate.
I remember myself saying the exact same words to my Algerian student, who always thinks that his English is not good, and that he can only talk in English to Japanese people. He thinks that he cannot strike a conversation with native speakers because his English is still elementary.
Self-confidence is something that I've always lacked, in whatever I do. People say I give myself too little credit. As for me, I don't want to be confident because I'm afraid of failure. Failure had, has and will always have a big impact on me. I always give my best in everything I do, but I can't say I am confident of the results. For me, if I don't carry too much confidence, then if I fail, I won't be too disappointed. I hate expecting, because if I expect too much, and things do not go as I please, then there's disappointment, which is an understatement, really. It's more of like, depression.
Why don't I just go out with Japanese friends, you ask? Why go all the trouble of signing up for private lessons when you can have "lessons" when you're out talking with friends? That just means you don't know me very well. Going out is not my thing. Sure, I go out sometimes, but that is to take a breather. I don't want to pressure myself thinking about school and serious stuff when I'm with them. Second, they're all busy. They may look oshare and everything, but they are still students of the Tokyo University. They take their studies seriously, and would spend hours in the library studying. They would even sacrifice days that would've been ideal for going out somewhere, just to study. Lastly, students who are always going out are those who love drinking. And most of you know that I DON'T DRINK. So there.
Okay, that would be enough rambling. Right now, all I want to do in my remaining months here in Japan is to improve my conversation skills, and I will just do my best to do just that, without expecting anything. My friends said that I have improved during the past few months, but I don't think it's enough. I have a goal I badly want to reach, and I must do everything I can just to be suitable for that kind of job. Oooh~ Pressure.XD
- Mood:
complacent
Profile
![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
chibi_boom- チビ リサ
- Boom in Japan
Page Summary
Designed by chasethestars
chasethestars
Comments
Uh, okay, I think what I wrote above didn't make things any better for you **gets shot** But linguistically speaking, you have the perfect setting for acquiring the language unhampered and unabated. Context is everything, so it goes to show you're better off than most people learning Japanese in a, say, dinghy classroom. Like we do. XD So you have the bigger balls to string loads of japanese texts and still appear and sound so kakkoi (gasp), unlike well, weaboos like the rest of us which can only say, o-ha-you-go-za-i-ma-suuuuu Lol random.
Aiee, on a lighter note, I meant to say THANK YOUUU for the lovely (and le gasp, so many penises *o*) setoyami <3 The huge chunk of Japanese text blew me away, though; so when you come back, you will have to read me that part. XDD
ILU BLOOMER ;p
About the other *adult* part, you're welcome. I'm sorry if it's 30% dj 70% novel I think? I didn't even try to open it page by page.;A; Probably because it's not mine and I wouldn't want to give something that I had perused already.:P I'll try to get a real dj next Comike, ok? :)
*hug*